Randoms fics

[yami_samuraiflo]

So, I tired the Random Pairing Generator again. And I'm almost sure this thing is evil or possessed, or both. At the very least, it's biased ...
Well, it was still fun.

Stories corrected by cheysulinight. Thank you for your help! 

Title: Verbal War
Prompt: Slingshot / Skywarp / damaged
Pairing: None
Rating: PG-13 or T ; Skywarp and Slingshot aren't exactly nice with each other.
Characters: Slinghshot, Skywarp, mentions of the other Aerialbots and Thundercracker.
Summary: What could two ennemies do when they were damaged in the middle of nowhere?

Usually the aftermarth of a battle is full of silence, because the two ennemy factions had the good grace to take their injured and leave.

 

However, two people seemed to have missed the memo, mostly because they had been alone when they had come across each other in the sky during their respective patrols.

 

Leaving an Autobot and a Decepticon alone, even without weapons would likely result in the deactivation of either of them.

 

Two flying mech were stranded on the ground, heavily damaged and glaring at each other with barely contened fury.

 

They couldn’t really move, as it was too painful and too dangerous to do so, but they could talk. Or more exactly, they could shout. And anyone in the vicinity would have surprised at the rather large vocabulary they knew when it came to insults.

 

Of course, since they had begun more than three Earth hours ago, they were running low on creativity; but they were still at it.

 

“Decepticreep!”

“Stupid piece of slag!”

“Pathetic scrap metal reject!”

“Autoscum!”

“Your mother was a trash compactor!”

“I’m a robot, not a squishy, so I don’t have a mother!”, growled one of the two mechs, “And your creator is a rust infected-idiot!”

“Look who’s talking!” Snorted the other mech. “It’s your fault we crashed here!”

“My fault?! You’re the one who ran into me!”

“And you were the one pulling totally stupids movements in the air!”

“I’m not the one who sent us spiralling madly around!”

“And I’m not the one stupid enough to teleport next to a mountain at incontrolable speed!”

 

That was true, Skywarp had to agreed. But he couldn’t exactly control the direction he took when a airborne nuisance was obscuring his sight.

 

So, he hadn’t been able to avoid the mountain; what was the problem? It wasn’t exactly the first time it happened, and it probably wouldn’t be the last. And unless he was mistaken, it wasn’t him who held the record of the most impressive crashes, but the Aerialbot Fireflight.

 

Even him had to admit he was impressed; how someone so young had been able to surpass him in just two or three Earth years was a wonder...

 

He mumbled when his left wing began to ache, reminding him he was injured and unable to go back to the Nemesis alone. With his comm link disabled, it wouldn’t be for a while. Hopefully, Thundercracker would come once he realized he wasn’t back for his shift, if only to kill him himself.

 

Well, at least he had won the fight.

 

Or he thought he had, but Slingshot wasn’t about to agree with him on that.

 

Skywarp growled. Primus, he hated this Aerialbot!

 

Why, of the all the flying mechs in the Autobots forces, did he have to find this one? With Silverbolt, he could have managed, or even with Skydive or Fireflight, even if the latter was truly a menace for everything that flew, but Slingshot?

 

Someone up there really hated him.

 

The mech knew more cuss words than him and he was almost as stuborn!

 

If he had not felt obligated to not be bested by this stupid excuse of a flyer, he would have gladly fallen into recharge to save his energy. But as it was, Slingshot wouldn’t let go of the verbal war.

 

Still, some of the comments he made, especially those about ‘Screamer, were valide and very accurate. He had taken notes and planned to use them himself when he was able to reach the base.

 

But he wasn’t going to tell the Aerialbot he had given him ideas. Not even over his dead body!

 

Trying to look more smug than he felt right now, he began a new litany of curses, instantly followed by the other injured mech.

 

What else could two ennemies do when they were damaged in the middle of nowhere, after all?

Title: Stupid Mistake
Prompt: Vortex / Ramjet / mistake
Pairings: Implied Ramjet x Thrust x Dirge, one-sided Vortex x Ramjet
Rating: PG-13 or T
Characters: Ramjet, Vortex, mentions of other Decepticons
Summary: It's party time on the Nemesis! Too bad for Ramjet, he just made a move on the wrong person ...

It was a Pit of a party, and Ramjet had drank more than his fair share of Energon, but who cared?

 

For once since they had landed on this pitiful, fleshbags infested planet, they had won the battle with the Autobots and, to his satisfaction, he had managed to send one of those two cursed Twins plunging toward the ground.

 

The resulting sound when the mech had hit the ground would be forever kept in a part of his CPU.

 

Even if he doubted he was dead, for the Autobots had a skilled medic, it was more than satisfactory. Especially if one considered the number of times he had ended up in the Constructicons’ hands because of them.

 

He wasn’t the only one pleased with himself. Even Megatron was smilling, and that was rare enough to be mentionned.

 

Laughting like crazy at what Skywarp was doing behind Starscream’s back, he looked around for his wingmates. He was feeling in a very good mood tonight. In fact, he was in a very loving mood, and he knew for a fact neither Dirge nor Thrust would say no to a good merging.

 

Keep his hands at a low level, he tried to grab his nearest wingmate aft.

 

Too bad for him that, being drunk like he was, he miscalculed and grabbed the wrong aft. The mech he grabbed stiffened under his touch, before asking calmly – far too calmy – in a soft voice:

 

“Care to tell me what you think you’re doing, Ramjet?”

 

Upon hearing him, Ramjet froze. Oh no, please Primus, someone tell him it was a nightmare, someone tell him he had no made a move on...

 

He instantly let go of the other’s aft and backed away slowly, trying not to show how nervous he was.

 

“So...sorry, Vortex,” he sputtered nervously. “It was just a stupid mistake! Really!”

 

The Combaticon chuckled darkly, and Ramjet felt his spark sink. If you wanted to survive in the Decepticons ranks, there was one thing to remember at all costs: never try to pull a move of any sort on anyone stronger than you. If you do, you’re on your own.

 

It was really no surprise to see that everyone around them looked away or had already gone somewhere else.

 

It was never good when the resident interrogator chuckled like that. And it was even less good for you when he smiled like that.

 

“I’m sure it was.”

 

Ramjet cried out when the other caught him by the neck and pulled him to him. Their optics locked for a second before the Combaticon started to drag him towards the living quarters of the crew, without anyone trying to stop him.

 

Of course, no one was feeling generous enough or intoxicated enough to try to stand between Vortex and his prey.

 

Smiling to himself, the Combaticon pushed the Conehead against a wall, enjoying the gasp of pain and surprise he heard.

 

Putting his lips near the other mech’s audio, he added:

 

“And I’m also sure it’s going to be the last time.”